I DON’T WANNA LOVE YOU ANYMORE (15/?) - friends

Despite being public people, Jimin and Jungkook never had to hide their relationship from their fans. Hiding their break up, though… well, that was a different story.

or

The one where Jimin and Jungkook have both given up on their relationship but don’t know how to tell their fans about it yet. Through having to fake being on good terms to meeting new people, they might just fall in love with each other all over again.

[previous]

Jimin is wondering if he still has time to change his mind and leave when he feels a hand on his shoulder. It doesn’t startle him but it definitely makes his stomach drop with nerves.

“Hey.” Jungkook says as he walks into his line of sight.

“Hi.” Jimin answers, voice barely there as he lays his eyes on the boy he loves; it’s been a long time since they were alone like this and it hurts to look at him and not feel the warmth he used to when they were together.

“You haven’t ordered yet?” Jungkook asks when he looks at the table and finds it empty, except for Jimin’s phone resting to the side.

“Uh, no, I was just about to-“ Jimin moves to get up but Jungkook stops him.

“I got it.”

“Jungkook, I don’t-“ Jimin starts saying but stops as soon as Jungkook turns back to him and he sees the look in his eyes; it’s like he’s back to their last months together again.

“Relax, Jimin, it’s just coffee. It doesn’t mean anything.” His tone is so cold Jimin almost shivers just by listening to it.

“Our first date was just coffee, too…” He says before he can stop himself. “Did that mean something to you?” Jimin regrets the words as soon as he realizes what he just said; this is not how he planned their meeting to start.

“You were the one that insisted on meeting in person, why does it look like it’s me who’s trying the hardest?” Jimin doesn’t say anything to that, just looks down at his hands and clenches his jaw. Jungkook sighs. “Just let me buy the damn coffee.”

He walks to the counter before Jimin can say anything, leaving him to sit there and yell at himself inside his head about how stupid he is and how he’s only going to ruin everything again. The truth is that Jimin misses Jungkook more than he could ever put into words, but it’s incredibly hard to open up to him again and accept that the other still feels the same; he doesn’t want to go through the same breakup twice.

“I’m sorry.” Jimin says as soon as Jungkook is back, hoping he can somehow make this work.

“It’s fine.” Jungkook doesn’t look at him as he says it, focused on his phone. Jimin wonders if he’s talking to Yoongi.

“It’s not.” He forces himself to say. “And I don’t mean just now, I mean… for everything.” Jungkook finally looks up at him and he seems taken aback by the sudden apology. “I don’t know when we started falling apart but when I look back it feels like I didn’t fight enough to hold us together… sometimes it feels like I only made it worse.” Jimin looks away because he can’t deal with how intensely Jungkook is staring at him; he used to love it, having his undivided attention, but now it feels like he’s being burned by it.

“I treated you like shit, too, I’m not innocent either.” Jungkook says after a moment and puts his phone aside.

The atmosphere is heavy between them and Jimin hates it. He hates that this is what they became, that their love is nowhere to be seen and that now all that remains in the hurt and pain they caused each other.

“We made quite a mess, huh…” He mutters but doesn’t know if Jungkook even heard it because he doesn’t reply.

They stay silent for a few minutes, drinking their coffees and both thinking of a way to break the tension that hangs in the air. Jungkook is watching the street through the window behind their table and Jimin is watching him, noticing the small changes in his face even after just a few months; maybe it’s just the place he is right now but he looks harder, like he matured since Jimin left him.

“I wish it could have been different.” Jungkook suddenly says, looking back at Jimin who doesn’t have time to pretend he wasn’t staring.

“Me too.” He still answers because it’s the truth and Jungkook deserves to know he’s not alone.

“I really didn’t think we would break up someday, especially not like this…” Jungkook doesn’t look at Jimin as he says that, instead he’s drawing invisible patterns on the table with the tips of his fingers. “I also never thought we’d be sitting in the same spot we sat for our first date after everything that happened.” He breathes out a humorless laugh and Jimin only catches his comment because he was paying attention.

“Do you remember it?” Jimin asks after a beat and Jungkook’s answer is immediate.

“Of course.”

“You were so nervous, it was adorable.” Jimin can’t help the smile that appears on his lips, the memories of that day flooding his mind.

“What did you expect?” Jungkook looks up at him again and Jimin can see a glimpse of the unguarded Jungkook he used to know so well. “I had been crushing on you for months before you asked me out.” Jimin giggles at that, so freely it’s like there’s nothing worrying them anymore. Jungkook’s looks away out into the street again when he hears it and Jimin’s smile dies; it’s like the moment they slipped into some sort of comfort again, their minds decided to pull them back.

“Do you ever wish you could go back?” Jimin pushes the conversation forward again; he went there to talk to Jungkook, try to get at least a little bit of normalcy back into their ruined relationship, he’s not going to give up so easily. “To relive it?”

“What would you relive?” Jungkook is staring at him again but Jimin know what his answer is.

“All our first times, the good ones…” He pauses, not sure he’s supposed to say what he’s thinking about; in the end, he decides there’s nothing more he can lose. “But especially when you first said you loved me.”

Jungkook doesn’t say anything. He feels the weight of Jimin’s answer, seems to know what the older means and wants with those words, but he’s not sure what he can even say to that that won’t make them go too fast. He wants Jimin back, wants to feel him close again, but he knows they can’t do this the way they are right now.

“Why did you ask me to come here?” He asks, finally, and Jimin visibly deflates at that. It wasn’t what he was expecting to hear.

“I just… wanted to talk to you before we meet Yoongi to start filming.” It’s the truth, but only half of it; he wanted to ask Jungkook to stay, be by his side again, but he doesn’t. “Make sure we’re okay.”

“We’re not okay, Jimin.” Jungkook says and he sounds desperate, as if he wants to change that but doesn’t know how.

“I know, but can’t we try to be?” Jimin knows he’s close to begging but he will do whatever it takes to have Jungkook back in his life. “Can’t we be friends again?”

Friends. They both freeze slightly at the word. It’s not what they want and somehow they both know it, but it doesn’t stop Jungkook from saying,

“Yeah… Yeah, let’s be friends.”